yuppie rich girls

Oh, another one from The Pit. To be young and bitter again. I've become what I most feared..

When you detest the yuppie/baby boomer lifestyle, it doesn't take much to set you off when dealing with their spoiled brat ass offspring. Then again I don't like people in general. Maybe that's got something to do with it. I just don't know.

Anyway, yuppies are annoying. I don't like the way they dress, act, walk, talk, party, socialize or drive.

Your yuppie jobs piss me off too. Any job where you have to play dress up everyday is too much for me. Yuppies make too much money and should give me some of it.

When you're at a party, have fun. Don't talk about work. I don't care about your stupid job, your stupid kids, your stupid car, or your stupid yuppie friends. I only care about your stock options if you're going to give them to me. I also don't want to know about your golf game. I want to know where the beer is, so I can get drunker. Then I want to know how drunk your gonna get so I can mess with your head.

Don't invite me to a wine tasting party. I don't want to taste wine for fun. I want to swill wine to get drunk. Wine never needs to "breathe". It needs to be opened and drunk as quickly as possible to maximize the buzz.

Stop having kids. There are already too many useless people in the world. If you must reproduce, quit telling your kids that they are "special". Dogs are "special". Kids are "hassle". Quit spoiling them too cuz then they are gonna expect it from everybody, all their stupid lives. I'm not your Daddy, honey. I could give a rat's ass who he is or what he does.
Don't tell your brats they are smart either, cuz then they'll start to believe it. Make them PROVE they are smart.

All you spoiled little rich bitch Daddy BMW drivin' brats listen up. Life isn't "Beverly Hills 90210" or "Melrose Place".

You never had to deal with SHIT because Daddy has always been there to cover your pitiful ass. Daddy put that crown on your head Princess and I'm here to knock it off. I don't care about you and I don't owe you shit.

Sorry to burst your little Princess "fantasy world" bubble little mushroom queen. This isn't Prom Night, this isn't the back seat of the football team's limo and this isn't the Miss Whatever Beauty Pageant. Nobody likes you here. This is the real shit honey. By the way--your not half as cute as you think you are.

Tragedy to you is that in "Death of a Salesman" and "Romeo and Juliet" Willie, Romeo and Juliet killed themselves, so they are going to Hell. You think that's the only reason these are tragedies is because suicide is a sin and you go to Hell for it. Do us a favor and commit some sin, Honey. Please.

Here's the deal Coco. Shakespeare and Arthur Miller didn't write for your God Aaron Spelling. This isn't FOX Wednesday night at 8 PM. We don't have to simplify it down for your single plot followin' ass. Maybe there's a little more to it than you think, like LIFE.

Some other yuppie bitch girl in a bar tried to explain to me how all rock and roll comes from Chuck Berry. Chuck Berry. You know the guy who only knows one guitar riff and who puts video cameras in the women's restrooms at his restaurant.

She then explained to me that B.B. King is the King of Soul. No stupid, that would be KING OF THE BLUES, something you've never had but you can live vicariously through B.B.. "The thrill is gone baby".

WHATEVER. Why do I even try? It's a constant cycle of yuppiesque mediocrity. The yuppies reproduce and pass on their tainted genes and values to their hatchlings. Greed, arrogance, and anal retentiveness.

That's OK honey, you've never had to do anything for yourself and never will. Daddy will always be there to buy that car, pay that tuition, get you that internship or grease those palms at the beauty contest.

All you gotta do every once in a while is plop that boney little butt in Daddy's lap so he can get that forbidden little hard on and think those dirty little thoughts you know you like a little bit. Don't you? Uh huh. Go ahead, screw up the family line a little more. There aint no lifeguard at the gene pool baby.

OK. So I'm jealous. I want some of the money. I want to be spoiled. I want somebody to sit in my lap. I'm tired of work and self reliance, integrity, and individuality. I want to be like all the other insects out there. NOT.

OK, so I live in a high rent yuppie populated area. It's all a clever ruse. This is where the revolution is going to start and I am the mere front line.

"I'd rather stay a child and keep my self respect
If being an adult means being like YOU"
The Dead Kennedys